IncrediblyStrangeCreatures

The Incredibly Strange Creatures Who Stopped Living and Became Mixed-Up Zombies (1964)

With a title this long the movie has to be good, right? Well not really. The story here is that there is a gypsy woman with a much cuter sister. This annoys the gypsy woman so she likes to put people in trances and toss acid on their faces. Not being mean enough to kill them she keeps them in the closet with the help of her henchman, who might or might not be a hunchback. It is there that our “hero” enters the movie. His name is Jerry and he makes the mistake of falling for the good-looking sister. This makes him a perfect candidate for being hypnotized and sent off to kill another woman who had seen some of the gypsy’s secrets. After his killing spree she throws acid on his face and locks him in the closet, or at least tries too. Can you say jailbreak, or at least closet break? Soon all of her previous victims have escaped and after doing away with their tormentors go off in search of more victims.

Okay if you look up cheesy bad movie in the dictionary and this isn’t listed then it is a crime. This is a cheaply shot “B” movie with little or no effort made to make it worth watching on any level. The story is paper-thin and makes no sense at all. Most of the films runtime is a collection of dance numbers, songs, and people wandering around the boardwalk. After watching yet another dance number I said out loud “all this movie needs is a douche bag with a guitar to be complete…” boom there it is.

This has got to be one of the most boring movies I’ve ever seen, and earns it’s reputation as one of the worst films ever made.

Since this is such a terrible movie I’m inspired to do a Joe Bob Briggs style checklist. Lets do a quick rundown:

Dance Numbers: 6

Bad Songs: 3

Killings: 3

Hideously scarred freaks: 3

Hypnotized guy: 1

Zombies: 0

You read correctly there are no zombies. No one stopped living and no one became a zombie in spite of the title. But much like a terrible car crash where there are severed limbs lying on the road I couldn’t look away. So I do recommend that everyone check this out at least once, but don’t spend any cash on it.

½ out of 4

reviewed by John Shatzer