DirtyCopNoDonut

Dirty Cop No Donut (2008)

This movie is filmed like an episode of Cops, with some camera guy following around patrolman Gus Kimble as he goes about his business. It is soon apparent that he is a very dirty cop who just does whatever he wants and has no regard for those he is supposed to Protect and Serve. The film consists of several short scenes starring the “dirty cop” with little speeches from him as he's driving his cruiser in between them. In the scenes he steals some coke from a drug dealer and then makes him OD, takes food from a convenience store and refuses to pay the clerk (who can't stop smiling the entire time he's on camera), busts up a pawn shop, has sex with some prostitute he threatens to bust, sticks some vagrant he finds in a warehouse into his trunk, forces a child molester to cut off his own penis (yeah, it sounds like a good scene, but wasn't), busts up a Drunk drivers car, busts into a party then ends up giving drugs to the guests, remembers the vagrant in the trunk and dumps him out and finally goes to a domestic dispute and ends up getting in a fight with the couple. Towards the end, during one of his little rants, you find out he's not a real cop. At the very end of the movie, his “shift” comes to an abrupt end when the real police catch up with him at his apartment and take him away in handcuffs. Finally, you think it's all over... and then they start Chapter 2.

The acting in this movie is appalling. The ones who think they can act are the worst and the others just clown around as they are filmed, obviously not taking it seriously. I think the worst “death scenes” I've ever seen was in the very first clip of the movie where a drug dealer is forced to OD on his own merchandise by Patrolman Gus. (Ok, so the guy didn't actually die... it was still a bad scene.) I think the only real skill the main character has is belching for the camera. I watched this movie all the way through looking for some little nugget of goodness that would let me give it more than a 0 rating and couldn't find any.

The only thing good about this movie is it's name.

This was an atrocious/appalling/excruciating movie. (I had to use a thesaurus to look up other words for awful to help drive my point home.) Over the last few hours it killed a little bit of my soul. The only reason to watch it would be if you personally know someone in it and you want to laugh and make fun of them. Otherwise, don't bother with it.

I watched this move... so you don't have too.

0 out of 4

Reviewed by Scott Schwarzwalder